reflecting on expecting

_posts/2013-01-03-reflecting.md

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+---
+layout: post
+title: Reflecting on Expecting
+tags:
+- life
+- personal
+---
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+I don't really understand why so many of us spend so much time reflecting and predicting as the calendar year rolls over. I also can't help but do it too. While I don't publish here very often anymore, I do usually post something this time of year. However, this year I don't have any resolutions, certainly no predictions and, frankly, I'm not even sure what 2013 may bring.
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+What I have been doing over the past week or two (aside from overeating) is thinking about 2012. The world didn't end (which I'm okay with - I'm not done here yet), but that wasn't the only thing that didn't happen last year. I found myself often frustrated and unsettled. Truth is, I had a good year - my kids are happy and healthy, work is going well, etc. But, I had big expectations for 2012. It was going to be a year when I was going to make big life changes: buy a house, make some significant career moves, etc. None of those things on my list of "big things for 2012" happened. Not one.
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+It's an interesting experience: nothing I expected to happen did *and* life is good.
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+In fact, sitting here post-2012, I am not even sure if I even *want* many of the things I was so attached to expecting. Or worse (better?): they may even still happen, but not in 2012 and not the way I had envisioned. 
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+Life goals and aspirations and working hard towards them are all great things. Getting emotionally attached to the desired outcome on a set timeline (particularly one you don't fully control) is hardly a recipe for guaranteed happiness. I suppose I knew that intellectually, but 2012 gave me the experience to help it hit home.
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+Starting 2013 without any of that feels good. Time to enjoy the good year as it happens!